Stop pickin’ on me
Because I’m a geek
I’m strange to you
You’re strange to me
Well one of these days
I’m gonna pack heat
Your brains on the wall
My face… my face on TV!

They dissipate the pungent odor of a power holder
Sand kickers coming sixty clicks upon the sonar
They’re gonna fold me over like a Trapper Keeper folder
If this was D&D, you’d see me jump into a portal
I’m a geek — spelled G-double-E-K
I meet my boys in the basement about every day
A card table, comic books and cans of coke
That we blow out of our nose after a Star Wars joke
We got style — tape on our glasses
Zits on our faces, and hair on our asses
Shiny shoes, belt buckles, and pocket protectors
Tricked out back packs like my main man Venkman’s
We got problems — namely the jocks
The SUV suckers with class rings on their cocks
Otherwise known as the motherfuckers touching the tit
If I was Wolverine, you’d hear my knuckles go, “SNIKT!”
I’m not perfect — the before picture of Peter Parker
I always trip and drop my tray in front of the girl that always sparkles
I got brains — fuck B’s and C’s
I got a grade point average higher than Hendrix on New Year’s Eve


Don’t fuck with a geek just cuz he got a gift
You get in my way bitch, you get a Vulcan neck pinch
One night I didn’t go to sleep — up playing Risk
At dawn I won, got global dominance
But it in the hallway it’s completely different shit
Can’t get my locker open and my pants are always split
Can’t seem to catch a ride
Can’t ever get a date
But in my mind 7 of 9 thinks I’m great
Prom night bites! Primadonnas prevail
I’m at home reciting lines from “The Holy Grail”
Stuffed nose and some swollen glands
Never been kissed, never been holding hands
Just bust my biscuits over Britney in a bubble bath
Darth Vader with inhalers in case my lungs collapse
The dragon died from a heart attack
You may advance and yo, I upped your armor class
Being a geek, it aint so bad
I can’t get laid, I got Japanime stashed
And a mind jam packed with sci fi facts
Dreadnoks rock! Dinobots kick ass!