Unlike many other Malay males, I am rather ashamed to admit
that I am one of those few who do not know how to ride a
motorcycle. After mastering the bicycle (it was my main form of
transportation through college), I went on and learnt to drive
the caged four wheeler, skipping the motorcycle altogether. I
never really thought that it has its consequences until lately.
Apparently, Putra UMNO has taken the Mat Rempits under their
wings and rebranded them as Mat Cemerlangs.
According to Putera UMNO’s head Datuk Abdul Azeez Abdul Rahim,
the “Mat Cemerlangs are the nation’s biggest assets”
and are actually a misunderstood lot as well as “having
the potential and excellence to become the leaders of tomorrow”.
So I had it all wrong. I didn’t actually need to slog through
school, college, uni, etc. with lessons, lectures, books, exams,
etc. only to end up as a single wage slave bachelor struggling
my way through to pay the bills for the rest of my life when I
could have made untold riches,
have women gawk at me in admiration and pleasure me at my will,
be recognized as the country’s asset and future leader, all by
being less of a political fencesitter
and getting myself a Lesen Memandu Kelas B2. Oh wait.
Those Mat Cemerlangs don’t even need to have a legit license
too, do they?
On that note, Happy Merdeka, yo!